Monday December 30th. We packed up the mini van and headed to SLC to have a getaway as a family. We hit up Toads for arcade games and prizes. Hoagies corner for some ice cream. Savers cuz I like thrift stores. Then off to hang out with my brother in law. My children adore him. We went to the Provo Rec Center which was a blast! Water slides, lazy river, jungle gym to climb on with more slides, pool, and hot tub. Cache Valley really needs to get something like this indoors. It was so much fun! After swimming we went back to Carson's house to change and then head out to dinner. We sat down at Texas Roadhouse and began enjoying some rolls. We placed our order and the waiter said they were backed up on food so he would put our order in and then grab our drinks.
About a minute later I felt a gush between my legs. I hurried to the bathroom to find all 3 stalls full. Once in the stall I found myself drenched in blood. It had soaked through the only pair on jeans I packed. As I sat on the toilet, blood was draining from my body. Flashbacks of my experience after having my miscarriage rose to the surface of my mind. Keep calm I told myself. Don't pass out I told myself. I texted my husband and told him to help. He called me and I told him what was happening. I told him to go grab a diaper from the car. I cleaned myself up the best I could with the ultra thin toilet paper public restrooms have to offer. I heard voices of mothers helping their children wash their hands. I unlocked the stall door and felt I was in a daze. I asked if any of them had babies and happen to have wet wipes and none of them did.
Let me see if I can put words into what I was feeling. I felt alone. My vision felt blurred. I felt like I wanted to scream and say "Do you not know that I am gushing blood?! Please help me!" I felt frustration. I wondered why people couldn't see I needed help. I opened the door to find my husband holding pads and a diaper. Back into the stall I went. I sat there for a minute watching the blood drain from me so I could see how quickly it was coming out of my body. I had blood all down my thighs. I cleaned up again the best I could with the ultra thin toilet paper and stuck the diaper beneath me and pulled up my blood soaked pants. Luckily, when I first felt the gush at the table, I put on my coat which hangs a few inches below my rear to hide the blood.
Carson and my husband gathered the kids and I went to find the server to tell him sorry but we had to leave and go to the ER. We had Carson drive since we were in an area where we didn't know where anything was. Pretty sure we hit every single red light. As we headed to the hospital my breathing was all over the place and I heard my husband tell me to breathe normal. So I took some deep breaths and distracted myself from the situation by texting the top ten maybe fifteen people who had recently texted me. I asked for prayers immediately because I was heading back to the ER, only this time somewhere in SLC.
There was a line at the ER just to check in. Someone grabbed a pad to place beneath me and had me sit in the wheelchair. Someone took my information on a piece of paper and we waited. We probably waited 15 minutes before getting checked in. Once in the ER room Chad, the Crisis EMT gave me some pads and the hospital undies to put on. I said um I'm going to need the huge diaper ones that they give women who just had a baby. I can fill those tiny pads in a matter of seconds. A nurse brought me a brief with gauze.
I got all cleaned up and climbed into the hospital bed. Thank heaven for wet wipes! The nurse took my blood pressure and put the heart monitor on my finger. The blood pressure monitor is supposed to measure your blood pressure frequently. They must not have set it because it never took one again. I sat there thinking I was grateful that my husband was with me because no one checked on me and with the blood pressure monitor not giving any nurses who may have been watching my vitals any information, I could have bled to death and no one would have known. Even when I took off the heart monitor and the alarm was sounding there was no heartbeat, no one came. Interesting observation.
Over an HOUR later I finally pushed the call button. Chad came back in and said they were busy and he would see if he could get a doctor in to see me. I will add that my bleeding had pretty much stopped by the time I had cleaned myself up and climbed into the hospital bed. There was a large clot that passed in the hospital before I got to my room and after that, things slowed way down. Apparently 6 cops, 2 ambulance workers, and hospital staff were trying to control an angry, psychotic, patient in a wrestling match across the hall. I was placed on the back burner. 4 doctors in the hospital plus 2 PAs and the ER had seen 140 patients thus far in the day.
I was bored and felt the urge to go to the bathroom. There was not a bathroom in my room which turned out to be a blessing. I walked out my door as the doctor was about to come in. I told him I could wait to use the restroom. He wanted blood samples and to do an ultrasound to see if they could see anything in my uterus. I told them I had one on the 10th in Logan and it was fine. He said we should do one anyway. Well they want a full bladder when doing an ultrasound so lucky them, I didn't go use the restroom.
The ultrasound tech was awesome. We were having good conversation and I was laughing, he was laughing, and then he put the wand on my abdomen and said whoa that is a huge cyst. I asked "Are you serious?" He replied "I love to joke but I am serious." I asked if I could have a photo of my cyst so I took one on my phone. The cyst is larger than my bladder which was full. Measuring just shy of 8 cm and over 3 inches diameter. That would equal larger than a baseball. I just googled the diameter of a baseball and it is 2.94 inches. I think my husband said my cyst was 3.15 inches. Shock. I've never had a cyst. At least not that I am aware of I should say. Shock from finding I have one. Rapid thoughts of another surgery, how did the tech in Logan not catch this, or it was rapidly growing in the last 20 days, from nothing to over 3 inches.
On the left is the cyst and the right is my bladder.
On a super funny note....my husband said I was delirious but I get loopy when I'm super tired and I was super tired. It was in the 10 o'clock hour that I had the ultrasound. Any way back to something I found absolutely hilarious. SO funny that I had tears streaming down my face from laughing so hard. On the screen the cyst and bladder are black and look hollow because they are filled with fluid. All of a sudden in the black I see a white tadpole swim across the screen in my bladder. As I am laughing I ask the tech what in the world that was. He said it was my urine entering my bladder. So he showed me again as more urine released into my bladder. Oh man...either late night or trying to find joy in the journey...or a combination of both.
Back in my room the doctor came in... who knows how much time had passed since I received the news of my giant cyst. The nurse was right behind him bringing in dressers on wheels. She began pulling things out of drawers and I felt myself panic. They hadn't said anything about what they were going to do. I felt anxiety watching trying to figure out what was going on. The doctor said the ultrasound looks good. He was at the computer looking up the results from my previous ultrasound in Logan. As he was looking at the monitor I told him to make sure he looked at the right ultrasound because I had had two different ones that day. One on my empty womb and one for a possible blood clot. I continued watching the nurse prep for something and began to calm my mind telling myself they won't do anything without telling me what they are going to do. I recognized what she was items she was gathering and realized it was for a pelvic exam and then my nerves calmed. Then it hit me that the doctor had said my ultrasound looked good. I said "Wait a minute, you told me that the ultrasound looked good when I have a cyst the size of a baseball!" He said "Yes, but your uterus looks good."
The doctor did a quick pelvic exam and told me to follow up with my doctor in the morning. He said the gushing could have been from me starting a period or could have been leftover material from my miscarriage. He said remnants can kind of be like a scab and when it peels away your body flushes it out. He told me the cyst could burst and I would feel a little pain and cramping but my body would absorb it. He said to follow up with my doctor on what he wants to do about the cyst because if they get to be 5 to 6 inches, they could twist which could cause issues. I feel like I'm falling apart at the seems and I'm only 35!
I was in the ER for just shy of 4 hours, getting back to my brother in laws just after midnight. At some point in time in the ER, a girl from registration came in and said "You have a copay of $200, how would you like to pay for that?" I told her we had one of those plastic cards that you swipe. We talked about how that would not be a fun part of her job..."Oh you are in the ER and your spouse is having a heart attack and you have a $1000 copay. How would you like to pay for that?"
On a side note, I have to say I had the best medical staff with the best personalities working on my care. They were down to earth, joking, and laughing right along with me, I felt completely comfortable and in good hands. Brooke, my nurse, was the sweetest bringing me warm blankets and hot pads. Chad and my husband hit it off talking about hunting and sheds. They practically became best friends when Chad said he could get my husband a Coke. Also when I was getting checked out I asked for a pair of scrubs since my pants were ruined. Chad returned and said "Here you go. One size that fits no one!" Ha ha! Nate my tech was funny. My doctor was great too. He got me laughing even harder than the ultrasound tech but I will save that story for when you ask me about it. :)
Thank you to my prayer warriors. I needed prayers quick cuz I didn't know what to expect. This situation completely caught me off guard. I thought my body was healing just fine from the miscarriage. To my friends who kept texting me asking how I was and checking on any updates, thank you! Thank you for your prayers and keeping me distracted by texting back and forth.
I called my doctor's office Tuesday morning and my doctor is out of the office until Friday.
To read about my first trip to the ER 3 weeks prior, read He Is Here.
To read about my first trip to the ER 3 weeks prior, read He Is Here.
